Entries for January, 2005
January 15, 2005
My First Day
today, i have done something new. it's quite simple and plain. i have started my own online journal. actually the main reason why im here right now is because of my kapuso (friend) joni. i noticed how she was so into her on line journal so i wanna try it out for myself. though im not as good as she is, i just want to have a place where i can write down my thoughts and experiences and share them with anyone who's interested. and i guess this is the right place. so bear with me if this is not as creative as the others.. haha im just learning. this is it for now. my mom's waiting for me, we still haven't eaten lunch. byeee...
Written by annagwazee at 03:59 PM.
January 16, 2005
Goodbyes Are Not Forever
Goodbyes have always been hard for me to handle. There's always something about separation that makes it so depressing. Im sure everyone has gone through this. But hey, I'm not talking about death here... HaHaHa
Just this morning, i said goodbye to a close friend. She had to leave for Manila. Though this hasn't been her first time to be away, i get sad everytime this happens. (exactly the way i feel everytime my mom or dad leaves for work, even if they'd be gone for only a few hours.. hehe) Oh boy, this means small groups and coffee nights would be different. And my heart not whole once more, having my kapuso gone. But then again, she promised she'd be back. So for the meantime, I'll let her Manila friends enjoy her company. Anyway, it's not everyday that Joni's with them. Ü
As a certain song says, "sometimes goodbyes are not forever." Indeed goodbyes are not forever because true friendship is like the wind. Though we may not see it, we can definitely feel it and then we are reminded, we would never be far from each other.
Written by annagwazee at 04:12 PM.
January 20, 2005
The Dream
I just got home. And it's official.... I'm definitely an Artian cheerleader turned CBA student who still longs to be an artian. WHY? Well, its that time of the year when once again, I'm reminded of the past when I looked forward to Januarys. And what makes it more painful is the thought that those moments can never be brought back.
Every year, our university holds its inter-college sportsfest. and for the second year, I can't be part of my beloved Artians Cheerdance Squad, the best squad in Bacolod. But this hasn't always been the case. During my first year in college in the University of St. La Salle, I had two majors, Psychology and Economics. And being in this college (CAS) meant that I could be a part of the Artians Cheerdance Squad. And of course, i was. And I'm proud to say that those were the best times of my college life. But when third year came, I had to face reality. I realized that I didn't like Psychology. So, instead of having two majors, I only focused on Economics. And along with the benefits of enjoying my major, I had to say goodbye *tear* to the Artians, one of the most heartbreaking events I had to go through. Since Economics belongs to the College of Business and Accountancy (CBA), I can't be part of the squad anymore.
Every year, we would win the sporstfest cheering competition. But its not the victory alone that i enjoyed. Late night practices and friends gave me all the reasons to have fun. The drummers, the bleacher cheerers, and the carpools added to the happiness i felt. And beyond these, i just loved the feeling of being an Artian. Just thinking about these makes me hurt so bad.
Since December, I have been attending their practices. It's the closest I can get to being actually a part of the squad. Watching them practice brings back all the memories, and I can't help feeling bad and sad inside. Though I can still dance in our regular performances, joining the cheering competition is way different. Being an Artian makes all the difference. And the sad reality (that I have to accept) is, these all remains a dream... aaaggghhhh!!!
{ mood } sad
Written by annagwazee at 07:39 PM.
January 23, 2005
The Week Ahead
My mom left for somewhere in Mindanao early this morning. She's gonna be facilitating an Ancient Paths Seminar. She'll be gone for a week. This means a week without my mother. Which also means a lonely week. It's different having her around. We do gardening together, we eat together, we play with our dogs together, we work around the house together, and basically spend almost all of our time together.
I guess I have to wait for a 'whole' week before everything goes back to normal. Whheeewww, that's long...
The anxiety builds up. Tomorrow marks the start of the inter-college sportsfest in our university. Tommorow is also the day for the cheering competition. My dearly loved Artians Cheerdance Squad is out to reclaim their throne, as they were 'cheated' on last year. This is so nerve-wracking. But i have faith in them, especially in our trainor, he's the best. Oh boy, i can't stay calm. I'm so nervous!
{ book } The Scarlet Thread by Francine Rivers
{ mood } nervous
Written by annagwazee at 08:35 PM.
January 24, 2005
Cheaters
I'm not even gonna talk about it. I just want to point out that what happened a year ago happened once more today. I'm not sure what "they" are trying to prove. I'm just positive that there are people from our university who are out to put down students who can overshadow "them" and "their" interests. "They" know who "they" are, and i guess "they've" got nothing better to do with "their" lives than look for ways to have things "their" way. Well, nothing can put us down. We know we are the best, and i believe everyone else agrees with that!
Hear this:
What goes around comes around
What goes up must come down...
I'm sorry if I sound rude. I'm just so disappointed with what had happended.
{ mood } crushed
Written by annagwazee at 08:21 PM.
January 29, 2005
birthday
Today is my kapuso 's birthday. And sadly, she's not here to celebrate her special day with us. The first time since we've become good friends. I miss her.
Written by annagwazee at 04:35 PM.
